Russian Fishermen Caught In A Swarm Of Locusts That Black Out The Sun

Looks like the Russians, despite their scowling faces and tendency toward road rage, can still have fun. All it takes is a plague of locusts, the likes of which haven’t been seen since Yahweh levied his wrath against Egypt. Look at these fishermen waving their nets around like they’re collecting fireflies on the 4th of July. That one portly gentleman in the bucket hat netted such a haul that he’s retiring to live off his locust money. “Very good,” he said. “Now I buy my house on lake, with boat and wife included.”

I’m assuming they’re using these locusts as bait, but maybe they’re going to eat them. You may recall that crickets have become a major staple snack for people struggling to find consenting sexual partners. These guys don’t fit that mold though. Something tells me bucket hat is drowning in poon.

If you’d like to learn more about the locusts, Sir David Attenborough would be happy to teach you:

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