While My Phillies Sit In Last Place, Here Is Your Annual Reminder The Washington Nationals Fanbase Is Deplorable

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As we all know, The Washington Nationals clinched the NL East yesterday. It was their 4th division title in the last 6 years. Whoop dee doo, Basil. The love of Washington Sports by the wonderful residents of that district is widely known. Here they are on opening day embracing our National Pastime with some of that classic #Natitude.

Few things are better than attending a Sunday night baseball game on a lovely day in August in DC to watch their first place team. All of those Nats “fan’s” couldn’t agree more.

And here is a picture from yesterday afternoon’s game, right before they clinched the division. “32,000” “Nats fans” taking a few hours out of their day to watch their home team clinch the division, even though they wish they could have stayed home to argue identity politics with Twitter eggs and randoms on Facebook.

Honestly, this is every year with this city. It’s nothing new. Baseball is a tough game to watch in the first place unless you are a homer like myself. But cmon DC people! Have you no passion for anything? I get that it’s just a game, but it’s a game that is meant to be an escape from the tribulations of real life. How can a city not band together and celebrate while their home team who dominated the NL East all year, finally clinches the division? It’s no wonder they get bounced in the first round every year. I get that it was opening week of Football yesterday, but all those “Skins” fans didn’t seem to bother to show up for that game either.

Do my Phillies suck? Yes, they are God awful. I will be the first to tell you they are one of the worst organizations in all of sports right now. I am sometimes embarrassed to be a fan of them. If we are being honest, I think they might be 5 long years away from even being competitive again. However, when this Phillies team was pillaging the NL East during that glorious 5-year stretch, what did we Phillies fans do? Sold Citizens Bank Park out, Every. Fucking. Night. 257 straight home games. Sold Out. Meanwhile, the Nationals are sitting at 12th in attendance in the MLB even though they are 33 games above .500.

What separates Philly from most other cities is our passion. Not just with our Sports teams, but with everyday life. When our teams suck, like my Phillies, it’s “fuck you, pay me.” Why should we give our hard earned money to watch a team that doesn’t care if they win or lose? However, when we are rolling, I’ll be damned if we don’t show up in droves and wear our team colors with absolute pride.

So Nats “fans” enjoy your final years of relevance. Make sure you keep spreading all that #natitude around Capitol Hill like we know you love to do. Because in the end, Dusty Baker is your manager and a first round exit is almost as guaranteed as Bryce signing that $450m contract to wear Philly red on Opening Day in 2019.

Salty? You’re goddamn right I am. Now go back to Baltimore and get your shinebox, Nats “fans.” And remember this as well, The National League East is still the Phillies domain.

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